The Man Who Listened

Decades later I still recall the meeting.

I’d heard about him. He was a legend among Army criminal investigators. They’d worked with him in the United States, Europe, and a number of other locations, and his reputation was that he’d be assigned impossible interrogations and yet would return with confessions.

One day, totally unexpected, I met him. He was visiting the command headquarters in Washington, D.C. and wandered into my area. Our conversation was cordial and not lengthy, but I noticed something that no one who’d met him earlier had mentioned.

He was an extraordinary listener. I’ve never encountered anyone since then who possessed his ability to focus in an entirely amiable and nonthreatening way.

When he was with you, he was with you. You wanted to talk, and he wanted to listen.

I wish I could jot down little techniques or tricks that he may have employed but I cannot recall any. That failure to pinpoint may have been part of his secret.

Just as people have said that the great actors never let you catch them acting, he may have refined his investigative demeanor to that extent. His soft southern accent and gentle manner reminded me of the great evangelist Billy Graham. He was far from the sort of tough guy you might find in a Raymond Chandler or Dashiell Hammett novel.

Of course, I never sat across from him during an investigation.

But one thing I do know: when you were with him, you wanted to talk. It may be that many of the talkers he encountered in his career talked themselves into prison.

There is a famous historical anecdote about a lady who had the good fortune one week to attend dinner parties where she sat next to William Gladstone one evening and Benjamin Disraeli on another.

When asked for her impression of the two British political giants and rivals, she said that the rather stiff Gladstone was the most fascinating individual she’d ever met.

But her recollection of the conversation with the colorful Mr. Disraeli decidedly differed. After speaking with him, she felt as if she were one of the most fascinating individuals.

You can always spot good listeners but wait until you encounter a great one.